|Photo from : videohive.net|
I want to be a real writer.
I want creaky wood floors.
I want forests and fields wrapped around me like a many-patterned quilt.
I want to sip mornings slowly, consuming every hue of the sunrise like it will nourish my body forever.
I want to run on back roads, breathing all the clouds, swallowing all the sunshine.
I want to braid a little girl's hair and sweetly savor each weaving of strands, just as the blossoms are quenched by rain.
And it's funny that, through the battle I've fought with eating disorders, all I want to do is TASTE life. I guess I'm sick of denying myself that, too.
I accept my lot and I often love it (especially anything with my husband and sons!). I try to do well at EVERYTHING I do, like the wise King Solomon advises in Ecclesiastes.
I don't want to be dissatisfied with anything God gave me. But I find myself wanting to most effectively use the gifts He thoughtfully and creatively poured into me while I was being knit together in my mother's womb.
However, in the Spirit-filled words of my Sister, Heidi Baker, I must go lower still, so that I may have truly surrendered to Christ all that I am.
Will you pray for me, that I may go lower still, that I may surrender all of my "wants" so that what comes out of my life are only what God wants? I pray this for you, as well, Friends. Because God is good, and He knows what's best.